“BPW” - What’s My Rating?
So here we are…This was the song that received the most requests for the next track up. Honestly, this pick is in my Top 3, as in favorites on the album, along with “Hurt Me So Good” and “Girl Like Me,” which kind of set off this whole series. Those songs hit, but “BPW” hits a little different. Aside from “On It,” a sensual ballad coupled with the soulful and melodic sound of Ari Lennox, “BPW” is one of the raunchiest songs on the entire album. If you can’t tell by now, BPW stands for “Best Pussy in the World.”
Some of the world that isn't on to the warm sound of Ms. Sullivan were surprised there was such a song made by an R&B singing young lady. Men dominate the topic of boasting about their sexual abilities. Now in the same sentiment of the “Tragic” blog post, we, as women, are often taught only to be pleasers or to be gentle with men's egos. Meaning, if the experience was subpar, we pretend it was good. Dancing around the the truth, telling our partner how good it is just so they will feel good. Which leads to them self glorifying their manhood with their inflated “google review”. Well understand that women, too, have egos and we want to know the quality of our womanhood. We want to be hyped up too.
Maybe y'all ain't know this, but bitches like to hear that we're the best. Bomb head and the best sex. Tryna turn you niggas out, bussit down. Great pussy is the best flex. Then we send a "what you doin' later?" text. And when we finished, you be outta (breathe). Tryna make you wanna cry. Have you thanking God, saying that you're so blessed.
Prior to the song, there is Mona’s Tale (interlude); she talks about how she desires to be remembered by her lover. Specifically by the effort she puts into the entire experience. I can’t lie; I am very much an overthinker and often wonder what he is thinking or what did he think? Previously, I wasn’t bold enough, I would never ask that directly. But now, as my good friend Latia says, “I have no qualms about it.”
You know I ain't no regular girl, so tell me whenever I'm with you, I got the best pussy in the world. Gas me up. Talk that shit that makes me wanna back it up. 'Cause all your praises got me feeling bad as fuck (I'm that bitch). When you say I'm the greatest, I start actin' up 'cause my loving unforgettable.
Which made me think… What makes a woman “good” or unforgettable. So I decided to seek the perspectives from a few guys I know, some that are genuine friends and some that I've personally been intimate with asking…What makes a woman good or bad?
What’s my Google review?
Negatively speaking, aside from some of the obvious answers like scent/taste, many mentioned some of the other factors that play a role in a bad review. I can’t lie; I debated on asking because I came in with the mindset of “men will penetrate anything” and not provide genuine answers. Well, some answers were expected, but one comment stood out surprisingly pretty consistently.
First, let’s start with the obvious. Ladies, take care of your body, especially your lady parts, all the more, when you expect to engage sexually with someone. I shouldn’t have to say this, but if you are in a sexual relationship, make sure you get checked regularly to stay on top of you and your partner’s health status, etc. So yes, stay crisp and clean.
Secondly, is engagement. From the information I gathered, ladies they want us engaged (mentally, verbally, physically, etc.). I was hearing that nothing is worse than a woman that is just laying there. I definitely agree, buuuuuuuuuttttttttt, on the other hand, fellas you may not be satisfying her and she’s just ready for it to be over. Yet, that is where the communication comes into play and sexual expectations can potentially be met.
Now, lastly, I was slightly surprised with this response, from a solid majority of the men I asked. Can you guess? Let me first say, we as women, sometimes don’t give credit to men for being emotionally present. Leaving the most surprising answer that raises your BPW rating is how he feels about you. Literally if you has his heart or not. You can be an expert in the art of sexual satisfaction, but if he has little to no feelings for you…you can still just be okay. Then on the other end of the spectrum, you can be a virgin and he loves you with all of heart, you automatically receive a 5 star rating.
Cause if there was an award, I want the gold
And I don't just want your heart, I want your soul
And all my tricks gon' have you trippin', I've been told
That's why my ex's can't forget it
'Cause the shit just too good to let go
So here we are, ladies. Take it from a former people pleaser. If you find yourself in a mutually consensual sexual relationship, ENJOY YOURSELF! Be confident and live out your dreams and fantasies for reciprocal satisfaction. If you are not quite there yet on the virgin to dominatrix assertiveness scale. There are many tools out there to help build your confidence and skill level. Whether it is through counseling, a coach, taking a physical class, or old faithful COMMUNICATION with your partner, there are many resources in this world to make your sexual experience mutually enjoyable and unforgettable.
Therefore, ladies, the takeaway from this beautifully written ode to prowess women is to 'get yours,' then take a bow, congratulate yourself, and accept your award for “Best Pussy in the World.”
